Erin had to drop out of a sport for reasons out of her control. She had a love hate relationship with it anyway. She enjoyed the competition and it was good for her because mostly she tried to have fun with it and no matter the results, she always was a good sport. She had to give up a title she won this year, but were excited that a very deserving girl was the new recipient.
Today the new girl was presented with the title and Erin had the opportunity to go see her receive it, plus she wanted to support her friends in today’s tryouts for teams. But today… three of them at team tryouts wouldn’t even speak to her. They wouldn’t speak to their friend of five years because – apparently – she is no longer in their club.
As a Mom, I’m very hurt for Erin and I’m angry as a Momma Bear. Another girl left the organization during national competition because some of these same girls didn’t include her in a ghost tour. While I think the whole situation was blown out of proportion, I can definitely understand the hurt that must have been inflicted upon her after years and years of being snubbed.
The snubbing also happens online. While no one is “teased” per se, the constant posts about how much they love this person or that person and how much they miss her and her and how much they loved spending time with her and her and they are best friend forever! … that over-the-top I’ll-make-sure-the-whole-world-knows-who-I-like-and-it’s-not-you is exhausting. It’s subtle, but feels deliberate. And today rather confirmed it.
Erin felt the full force of the snubbing today. As a result, she will *never* go back to that sport unless it’s with a private coach only and away from these three. It also bothers me that the parents of these girls will trip over themselves to make excuses for their behavior. Maybe there was a headache. Or that’s just how the girl is when she’s concentrating or feels stressed. Or it just wasn’t a big deal, right?
However, what I see are spoiled, mean girls who are never held accountable for their poor sportsmanship. I understand they can pick their own friends, but there is a thing called common courtesy they should practice.
I do not wish bad or evil on them or their families. What I wish is that they could see how other people view their behavior. It’s not pretty. It’s not good. Shame on them for ignoring someone who was there to support them and cheer them on and who just wanted to be their friend.
Meanwhile, I’m proud of Erin because when she got home she said, “Mom. It’s just not worth fighting over.” and she let it go. I think my daughter is sometimes a bigger person than me.
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